The Greatest Children's Story of All Time?

Now I know what you're thinking; she's contradicting herself from her last post about her favourite children's book, well... yes, a little, BUT! mention has to be given to this one; it is without a doubt the silliest, and funniest, children's story that has ever crept into existance. It is just a shame that it was never made...

Black Books is an amazing British sitcom starring Dylan Moran, Bill Bailey, and Tasmin Greig. It is set in a bookshop named Black Books and revolves around the lives of Bernard Black (Moran) the hilariously embittered and hostile shop owner, Manny Bianco (Bailey) is his wacky juxtaposed assistant, and Fran Katzenjammer (Greig) who goes from owning a shop next door, to what appears to just be hanging around the shop and being another catalyst for the ridiculous scenarios one wouldn't normally expect from a bookshop.

I have always said that if I ever find myself working in a bookshop, or, by some chance miracle, owning one; I would have to channel the inner Bernerd and take on his nihilistic world views, as everyone who has ever worked in any type of retail will understand just how much you would love to hit them with a broom while yelling down a megaphone at customers. 

Anyway, there is one particular episode called 'Elephants and Hens' where the shop is hosting a childrens themed book day and Fran bets Bernard and Manny (who is dressed as a bookworm for the day) that they can't write a children's book before she returns from her hen party. Undeterred, they overconfidently accept the bet and after a very haphazard planning session they eventually make, what I deem as one of the best, children's stories, and it goes as such; 

'There is the Elephant. He's happy with his balloon. Oh no! It's gone! Where is it?! It's not behind the rhino. Look inside the alligators mouth: it's not there either! Ohhh... the Monkey's got it in the tree! He brings it back. They all drink lemonade. The end.' 

After creating such a masterpiece however they realise that their impending riches and fame will only bring them misfortune and, in an intoxicated haste, burn the book. How I wish this was an actual story. I would read that to my children at nursery in a heartbeat, all the while surpressing the inner Bernard deep within me.